Cruel or awesome?

I think there's a fine line.



But having given it careful consideration, I've decided that this site above is in fact truly awesome, thus negating any small amounts of cruelty involved.


In other news, I'm heading back 'Home' home in the morning for the Easter break, away from Sheffield and University to all the pleasures of my mam's cooking and my family... and I couldn't be fucking happier about it.

Orwellian seeds

I worry a lot.

Especially when I wake up to find the back-door has been discretely forced open, and a shiny ID card with my name on it is sitting on the counter.

I am, of course, talking figuratively... but today, hidden away on page 15 of the Guardian, is a little article which, very matter-of-factly, tells us that ID cards will now be compulsory with all passports issued from 2010.

Hold on a second!

It's been no secret over recent years, and months, that the debate over ID cards was a hotly-contested one. "Protection from illegal immigrants and terrorists", they tell us. "Orwell was right!", we (or at least I) shout back. A lot of people have very strong opinions on this; one way or another. So, you'd think that such news as this would be front-page stuff. At least, I hoped it would be. But no.

And here's why. What's basically happened is that the Lords, who've been blocking the proposed legislation to make ID cards compulsory for ages now, in the end proposed a compromise today to allow the law to be passed; requiring all passport applicants from 2008 onwards to get an ID card, but with an opt-out period until 2010 for those of us who don't want one.

Y'see, I have a serious problem with that word 'compromise'. My problem being... this was not a fucking compromise. This is ID cards through the back door, with no substantive changes to what the government want; allowing Labour to much more easily pass the necessary laws to make ID cards compulsory for all (regardless of passport application) if they get re-elected. And even if the Tories get elected, and try (as they have stated) to repeal the law, it may well be far too late. Charles Clarke has even admitted this, saying that he thinks it would be too difficult by then to stop it. The civil liberties train will have well and truly left the station. Clarke is gloating about it, and no-one even realises.

And why did the House of Lords 'compromise'? Because they were offered this 'opt-out' clause. Which is a fucking joke, to be blunt. It's the spoonful of sugar, making the evil medicine go down easier. "Oh, that’s fine, people can opt out can they? Alright... have your ID cards, as long as you’re not forcing them on people..."

But they are forcing them upon us. At least, they will be very, very soon.

So, if you need a new passport, be prepared for a "background check". Don't worry, if you haven’t done anything wrong, they won’t find anything, so it'll be okay right? Wrong. This isn't how it should be. Background checks for everyone, regardless of character or lack of suspicion? This isn’t the path I wanted to see us turn down. Perhaps I’m being naive; to be honest I think we turned down this path a long, long time ago.

Don't Shoot The Puppy

The Internet is good for many things:

• School work.


• Research.


• Blogging!


• Downloading music (legally or otherwise...)


• Keeping in touch.


• Business.


• Online gaming.


• ...and yes, of course, porn.

But one of the best things that the Internet is good for often gets forgotten. It is perhaps the biggest guilty pleasure on the Internet; possibly even more unspeakable; even more taboo, then the dreaded pr0nogaphy that is, so we are told, eroding the very fabric of our society as we speak...

I do you. You do it. I bet even your mother does it.


Timewasting.


The Internet is fucking fantastic for timewasting. Oh, the guilt that courses through you when you look down at the little clock at the bottom of your screen and you see that for the past 3, 4, dare I say 5 hours you've been browsing random articles on Wikipedia; rating the varying aesthetic qualities of the Hot Or Not members; pushing for that high score on BMX Backflips; or sending round those daft joke emails to all your mates.

But it's okay. We mustn't worry aout this. Sure; you're not spending as much time with the family as you should. Yes; you're not filling in those forms for your boss. And indeed; I am not working hard enough for my Law degree. But, at least we're having fun... and we don't even have to shoot any puppies.

Stuffed

When you're a student, you don't really eat well. I'd say the vast majority of students don't really have a very good diet. I, certainly, have a terrible diet. Consists of a lot of pasta, and plenty a fish finger sandwich.

Really the only times that I get a good meal is a) when I go home, or b) when I fork out some money to eat out somewhere. a) is rare (like the upcoming Easter holidays) and b) is even rarer. If there is one thing more consistent in students than poor diets, it's empty bank accounts.

So, I shouted my best-mate Kier to dinner at a place called Aunt Sally's; a pub-style place that has a permanent two-for-one offer on food. When you can get two HUGE Steak and Ale pies, with chips, for little over seven quid, you know you're onto a winner. Plus a couple of pints of Stella, and the day is complete.

There's not many things (excluding sex) that are as satisfying as a good meal. Especially when you don't have your mam to cook for you every day.



Here's that joke I promised you yesterday. Please don't read on if you're easily offended.

What uses a gallon of petrol in 15 seconds and doesn't move?



A Buddhist monk.

I'm very... very sorry.

2,000 words of fun

So, I started my Corporate Insolvency essay today.

Yeah, you heard me. Corporate. Insolvency. It's like the two most fun-sounding words in the English language put together. Believe me, the results are just too fun for some people.

For those of you that may be interested, here is the question that I have to answer, in approx. 2,000 words.

“One of the objectives of insolvency law is to protect and maximise value in the financially troubled company for the benefit of all interested parties and the economy in general.” Explain and illustrate how this objective is to be achieved in the context of the rescue procedures available in English law.

Does that not just fill you with joy?

I know you're all intriqued by this now, and you are dying to find out just how, if one was so inclined, to go about rescuing a failing company. Well, if you're lucky, I may post my essay when I've finished.

Or, maybe I won't.


As is clear to you by now, I have nothing of actual interest to say tonight. I'm sorry to have let you all down. I promise that I will post something interesting tomorrow. Either that or an offensive joke.

Caves

If you didn't see tonights episode of Planet Earth, here's what you missed.

1. Caves so big that a jumbo jet could fly through them.


2. What looked like a galaxy of stars, but was in fact hundreds of Glow worms using beautifully deadly silken threads to catch their prey.


3. Crazy people sky-diving into the 400m deep entrance to the Cave of Swallows, Mexico.


4. A 100 metre high pile (!) of bat droppings.


5. Hundreds of thousands of cockroaches, who live on said pile of bat droppings.


6. 6 metre long crystal formations hanging from the ceiling in the Chandelier Ballroom; part of the Lechuguilla Cave, USA.


7. Gigantic underwater caves, that stretch hundreds of hundreds of miles.


8. Some of the most bizarre creatures I have ever seen.


9. Snotites!

Yes, snotites. Basically stalactites formed by bacteria and sulphuric acid that, you guessed it, look just like huge hanging globs of snot. Faaaaantastic.


Before I go on I just want to make a claim. Planet Earth is the best series I've ever seen on TV. Not just the best nature programme, of which I'm sure no-one can disagree, but the best - period.

"Not hard!", I hear you cry, and yes, you only need to turn on the television to any channel at any time of day or night to see how much shite there really is on there, beamed into our cosy homes straight through Lucifer's Dream Box. But once in a while, there really is something on that's worth it.

For the past four weeks now I have sat for an hour watching Planet Earth in absolute awe. The images are breathtaking, the footage stunning, and the coverage enlightening. Each episode has shown things that I, and I imagine nigh on everyone else watching, have never seen before. My jaw has hung wide open on numerous occasions.

If anything, this programme has highlighted just how much stuff there is out there on this planet of ours, that we take so much for granted, that we know nothing about. And that is on our own planet! What about "up there"; in space? And let's not even get started on how little we know about "in there"; in our minds. That we know absolutely fuck-all about.

I really want to talk more about this, and about the previous three episodes - but I won't cos I'll be here all night. And you're probably bored of me already...

Next week: deserts!

*sigh* Bedtime, I think.

Easy come, easy go...

Well, the most noteworthy thing about today is that a glorious morning (which totally lifted my mood from yesterday) soon turned into another utterly foul day. My mood followed...

As I have nothing interesting to say, I thought I would post a passage from the book I'm reading at the moment, The Archaic Revival, by Terence McKenna; psychedelic thinker and explorer, who investigated the true natures of our universe and reality by taking many a "heroic dose" of various psychedelic drugs deep in the Amazon jungle. In contrast to me, Terence has A LOT of incredibly interesting things to say.

"Information is loose on planet three. Something unusual is going on here. The world is not made of quarks, electromagnetic wave packets, or the thoughts of God. The world is made of language. Language is replicating itself in DNA, which, at the evolutionary apex, is creating societies of civilised beings that possess languages and machines that use language. Earth is a place where language has literally become alive. Language has infested matter; it is replicating and defining and building itself. At it is in us. My voice speaking is a monkey’s mouth making little mouth noises that are carrying agreed-upon meaning, and it is meaning that maters. Without the meaning one has only little mouth noises. Meaning is a crude form of telepathy – listen to my voice, my thoughts becomes your thoughts and we compare them. This is communication, understanding. Reality is a domain of codes, and that is why the UFO problem is like a grammatical problem – like a dangling participle in the fourth-dimensional language that makes reality. It eludes simple approaches because its nature is somehow embedded in the machinery of epistemic knowing itself."

Pathetic Fallacy

Well, what a fucking miserable day...

Horrible, horrible rain. It really gets me down when the weather is like this. So, I've decided to listen to the most summery music I have. Time for a bit of Bob Marley, methinks.

Just thought I'd also show my support for the REAL protesters in Paris, protesting against the new employment law that makes it easier for employers to fire workers under 26. Watching the news you'd think that there are mass protest groups smashing up everything in site; indulging in the pyromaniacal tendencies that lie within all of us (don't deny it). But in reality these are legitimate protests, marred by a small minority who (quite understandably) feel so desperate and powerless that they feel violence is the only way to express themselves.

Anyway, hopefully de Villepin will meet with the unions, and repeal this law. Studying Employment Law this term is really confirming to me what I already expected; that employees everywhere have very little power and protection from the law indeed.

Oh well.

"Don't worry about a thing,
cos every little thing is gonna be alright."

Small pleasures

It's not often I come across anything interesting in my Employment Law lectures (go figure) but I DID TODAY!

Thanks be to the anonymous Asian girl who was wearing possibly the best hat I've ever seen! It was knitted, floppy, with a peak, and was pink-and-white striped... Man I wish I could have got a picture of it.

Anyway, it was awesome... and it made me smile.

The best in avant-garde and experimental music.

Tzadik Records

Tzadik is, besides Ipecac, quite possibly the best record label out there. Owned by Saxophonist/free-jazz wizz/experimental maestro John Zorn, the diversity and originality of the artists involved is truly staggering.

Take a leap of faith, and order a random CD from here. You may hate it. Or it may just open your ears to a world of music you never knew existed.

My favourite blog...

Just thought, before I give you any reason to stay and read what I have to say, I'd tell you all about the best blog out there, One Red Paperclip, which is quite possibly the greatest idea in the history of great ideas for ever and ever. And it has amazing funtential...

It starts...

Well, this is my first post. Here I am, big wide world!

I've started this blog really as an online diary, but I don't want to restrict it in any way. On here you'll find everything and anything that I decide to put here; poems, rants, comments on current events, pseudo-philosophical thoughts (I seem to have a lot of them buzzing around in my head). Hopefully by putting them here it'll free up some space up there for something important.

Spring has sprung, apparently, and it's time for a head-space spring clean.

Hope you all enjoy it.